Naughty Guide to Iceland

Perhaps not the most obvious place to go for a sexy holiday, Iceland sits in the North Atlantic Ocean between Greenland to the west and the UK & Scandinavia to the east.

With a population of only 330,000, there's plenty of space to enjoy the dramatic volcanic scenery and fairy tale forests.

Despite the isolation, Iceland has many hidden charms which can beguile and seduce.

It's a spiritual place, where sex and nature combine to produce a sensual mix of heady eroticism.

The home of elves, magic and the Northern Lights, Iceland knows how to play to the senses.

Don't be fooled by this distant island's glacial image, because Iceland is anything but cold when it comes to sex.

So get ready to enjoy some hot and steamy action in 'The Land of Fire And Ice.'

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Equality and Gender in Iceland

Famous for their progressive attitudes towards gender and sexuality, Iceland was the first country to have a political party formed and led by women.

They were also the first country to have a directly-elected female head of state.

Then, in 2009, they went one better and elected the world's first openly gay head of government, Johanna Sigurdardottir.

Iceland has always paved the way for women's rights and it's one of the few places where women are encouraged to speak out about prejudice, chauvinism and sexual harassment.

Every year, there's a "Slut Walk" in downtown Reykjavik - a peaceful march which protests against slut-shaming, sexual violence, victim-blaming and other sexual and legal issues which are a product of modern 'rape culture.'

Marchers are encouraged to wear what they like (some even turn up nude) and walk loud and proud through the streets of the capital to show that women should be able to wear what they like without fear of verbal or physical abuse.

In general, Icelanders venerate women. Rudeness, disrespect and anything which makes a woman feel uncomfortable in public, will not be tolerated.

For instance, when I was in Reykjavik recently, I saw signs in restrooms telling women that if they were being harassed or felt threatened, to tell the staff immediately.

I tested this theory when I was being bugged by one guy, told one of the wait staff, and the guy was asked to leave the premises straight away.

I was quite shocked, but reassured at the same time and I felt much safer walking around Reykjavik for the rest of my stay, knowing there was this automatic 'protection policy' towards women.

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The Sex Trade in Iceland

Proclaimed as the world's most feminist country, stripping and profiting from nudity were both outlawed in 2010, although this had an obvious impact on the sex trade (prostitution is also illegal) and many strip clubs, bars and brothels were forced underground and became unregulated.

When it comes to sex tourism, too, Iceland often gets a bad rep, with many websites insinuating that Icelandic women are easy and slutty, which obviously attracts a certain type of tourist.

Once they land on Icelandic shores, however, they soon realize that the locals here will not stand for disrespectful or threatening behavior towards women, whatever their profession.

Because all paid-sexual activity has been forced underground, it can be difficult to find what you're looking for if you're after a little BDSM, swinging or fetish role play.

Many Icelanders use the website Einkamal to hook up with like-minded people, but be patient as Icelanders can be a little cautious and furtive when it comes to putting their heads above the sexual parapets.

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Elf Sex

Yes, you read that right. Did you know that Icelanders believe in elves? To the locals, elves (or "hidden people" as they are more commonly known) are very real and some women even claim to have had sex with them, declaring that they are better lovers than mere mortals.

So if you want to experience sex with an elf or two, the best way is to wander into one of the forests or through a volcanic valley, tune into nature and wait for an elf to come and whisper naughty things in your ear.

According to one elven sexpert, elves are tall and slim and emit light from their bodies.

They can read your sexual mind and know exactly what you want in bed, and they're very skilled in performing oral sex ("they have very long tongues.") What's not to like?

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LGBT in Iceland

As mentioned, Iceland is very open about homosexuality, transgender and other sexual identifiers.

The main scene is obviously in Reykjavik, but Akureyri in the north has a growing LBGT community with new bars and clubs opening all the time.

The annual Gay Pride march through the capital is one of the highlights of the cultural year, for all persuasions, with 85,000 turning up for the celebrations - that's a quarter of the entire population!

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Iceland's Penis Museum

More formally called The Iceland Phallological Museum, it holds the world's largest collection of penises and penile parts.

Most exhibits are animal penises, including whales, bulls, seals and even a hamster.

The museum also claims to own elf and troll penises, and it acquired its first human penis in 2011 when a 95-year old Icelandic man died and donated his member to the museum.

You can also visit an exhibition of penis casts of the silver medal-winning Iceland Olympic Handball team from Beijing 2008.

The casts are shown in a different order to the team photograph on display, so their identities are known only to them and their wives!

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Strip Clubs in Iceland

As mentioned, strip clubs are illegal in Iceland but they get around this by having 'Lingerie Bars' instead.

Inside, they look like a normal strip club, complete with pole, but the staff aren't allowed to use it, only the customers are!

You're also expected to buy drinks for the girls and this is how they make money - the more drinks customers buy, the more commission the girls make.

They have private rooms you can go to where the girls dance for you, naked. There's a no-touch rule but things like spanking are allowed if you ask.

You also get to play your own music and can take photos, so go prepared and you should be able to get a decent, personalized experience for your krona. Iceland is expensive, for everything, so get saving now.

Shooter's Coyote Club
www.shooters.is
Austurstaeti 12
9pm-1am weekdays, 9pm-5:30am weekends

 Formerly known as VIP Club (which got shut down,) Shooters is a lot seedier than Goldfinger but you can still get some naughty action if you're willing to pay insane prices for shots of very watered down alcohol.

They have private rooms and presidential suites, and lots of bachelor parties come here. You'll need at least 20,000 ISK ($180) to even get through the door here.

Sex Toy Stores

Adam and Eva
www.sex.is
Kleppsvegur 150

It looks like the last place you'd find a sex shop - industrial and surrounded by office buildings and busy freeways but it has everything you need in here.

From fetish wear and tons of vibrators, to BDSM, lingerie, massage oils and anal toys, they've got it covered.

You can also order online for delivery, if your Icelandic adventure has taken you to somewhere more remote (to try Elf Sex, perhaps?).

You can also try www.blush.is to get sex toys delivered to your hotel.

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